this was just the top story on CNN.com

http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/04/26/atheist.soldier.ap/index.html
I'm not really one to feel an allegiance with a person when we may only have one thing in common (you're lefthanded too? let's stick together!) but I wish this guy well. He's bringing up an issue that I think deserves attention. But no matter how his lawsuit turns out, it's very difficult or impossible to change the attitudes of people who will not accept you.

I'm an atheist and so are perhaps half of my friends? So I'm in a pretty comfortable enclave. But it's still discouraging to know that an honest and open Katy Baggs would be unelectable to high public office, that a lot of people would think I'm going to burn in Hell, that I have no morals, that I'm untrustworthy, that I'm unhappy or unfulfulled or bitter, that something tragic happened to me that made me turn and I could still see the light someday, etc. It's not like anybody's coming after me because I live a comfortable life as an able-bodied and -minded, middle-class, Caucasian, United States citizen. So my minority status is invisible. But atheists are a group that is still okay to openly hate.

I was watching tv news with a Good Friend, women and children were being bussed away from the Yearning For Zion ranch and I said that I was done and had long been done with giving a begrudging respect to some beliefs/lifestyles/whatever that are clearly wrong or harmful to people. He asked what, besides the FLDS child rapists, made me come to this. Here is an easy list:
- Obvious ones like terrorists and neo-nazis and such, yeah yeah yeah.
- Creationism/Intelligent Design. I'm slashing them because deep down they're not that different, except one doesn't care about science and the other pretends to be science when it is only lies. Discourages critical thinking.
- The movie Jesus Camp. Holy shit. Child abuse.
- Female Genital Mutilation. Vile. Culturally- and religiously-sanctioned misogyny and abuse. FGM kills.
- "Alternative" medicine or "faith" medicine. I just mean stuff that is provably nonsense, like homeopathy, or letting your child die of diabetes because you thought praying was better than a trip to the hospital. No no no. Encourages distrust of people who know what they're doing, and discourages seeking real treatment for a problem that may be serious.
- Scientology - It's a cult that will take all your money, and it does many other nasty things. Why, Beck?!
- Being against gay marriage. You're an asshole.
- Being anti-choice. It's fine if you just don't like abortion, but if you literally think women should not have the right to end a pregnancy, hey guess what: you're also against women having control of their own bodies and lives, and you're for more unwanted babies as well as higher rates of babies born with birth defects. There it is. But reproductive rights are about much more, and those also against contraception and truthful sex education are even more ridiculous assholes.
- Objectivism LOLZ
- The 28% of people who still approve of President Bush. Assholes. I mean...come on. I doubt there is hope for you, but perhaps you can still see the light. You will be in my prayers.

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Seen today:

A PT Cruiser with the license plate "CRWZN." Ass.

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oh shit where have i been

Perusing Tiny Nibbles for the last several minutes has alerted me to the fact that there is a NEW MARY ROACH BOOK out that is about SCIENCE AND SEX. I must own it.



Also: Happy Birthday, You.

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i think of lies to tell to hypothetical nosy people

"I fell on my face a couple of days ago. Well, I was in my living room and I slipped on a DVD case. I fell on my on my tv and my chin hit the top edge of it."

This was the story I was planning to tell any stranger who asked what happened to my face, so I wouldn't have to explain that I was modeling for an art class and I fainted when the hot lights overtook me, and that this happens sometimes, and yes I was nude if you really had to ask, and yes the students behind me probably saw my privates but I wasn't thinking of that at the time.


I talked to my mom on the phone today, she keeps asking me if I'm looking for a job and reminding me that my money will run out and telling me I don't want to waste my education and being ambivalent about other things I brought up. Too many things are uncertain enough that I can't make a decision on anything right now, but it is money that I worry about the most. That and how much my feeling of worth as a human being is tied up in whether I can force myself to take a job somewhere, doing something, when I still can't tell what I want to do or what I could at least stand doing or what lucrative skills or knowledge I have at all.

I'm going to clean house and try not to worry about it tonight.

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we had thunderstorms tonight

But before that, I looked in other people's living spaces.





Birds perched just outside my window.

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I got a broken face uh huh uh huh uh huh uh huh oooooh

Here's an email I just sent to my parents:

Hi Mom and Dad, I injured myself today. I was modeling this morning and near the end of a long standing pose, I either fainted or almost fainted - I do remember falling down and I remember landing on my chin. This has never happened to me while modeling before, but it was early in the morning and I hadn't had time to eat much for breakfast, and I had been standing for several minutes and it was hot in the room so I sort of fainted. I started to get lightheaded and I asked to sit down for a minute, but I didn't move to sit down soon enough and I fell down instead. It was kind of alarming, but models can faint because it can get so uncomfortable and I'd been told before that it happens. Anyway, I got a cut on my chin that I dabbed with a paper towel until it stopped bleeding, and I worked through the rest of that class and had to go to my own class right afterwards, but I noticed that the cut wouldn't stay together unless I held it together, and I was worried about this especially since it was on my face, so I called Student Health but they said they didn't have any appointments open this afternoon, and then they said they were putting my call through to a nurse but they accidentally hung up on me, damnit. So I went to UI QuickCare, they have an office in the Old Capitol, and I saw a doctor there. I showed them my BCBS card and filled out some bullshit paperwork and they weighed me and took my blood pressure which was fine, and I got a special sterile medicated patch put on my chin which will hold it together for a few days while it heals. The $10 co-pay was worth it to hear that I didn't need stitches and to have my face bandaged better than I could have done myself. So I'm just telling you guys that this happened today, but I'm fine.

Here are the pictures I didn't send them:


It looked worse than this before I cleaned it. Also the wound is out of focus, sry.


This is how I will look for the next couple of days. Nobody laugh.

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lolwut

Today I got a message in my school email address about a prize giveaway:

Kaplan’s End-of-School Work and Play Giveaway lets you choose you prize. Whether you’re considering business, graduate, law, medical, dental, optometry, pharmacy school or just looking forward to the summer, enter today! Fifty (50) lucky people will win their choice of a Kaplan course or Nintendo Wii(TM). Other prizes locally will include twenty (20) movie passes from Coral Ridge Mall & two (2) free Kaplan courses. We have also partnered with Chick-Fil-A to offer sandwiches over the lunch hour.

You can choose a test prep course OR a Nintendo Wii?

You can choose a boring thing OR an awesome thing, which will it be?

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Spittin' out the naughties

A couple of days ago I took pictures of myself mouthing curses and cheeky words at the camera. You can only get one part of the word in a picture though.



"-tch"


"sh-"


"Fff-"


"-hole"


"Wein-"


"-ulv-"

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